Playing with our Expectation!

I find myself again at the point in the module where everything becomes topsy-turvy! For me each module is a roller-coaster of learning, and emotions, at the centre of the roller-coaster is a perpetual loop-the-loop. When I find myself here, my first reaction is mild confusion, building through queasiness to wild panic. However, I have learnt through the last two modules, when I begin this cycle to return to reading... Holistically it guides me, not out of the loop, but instead lets me experience the highs and lows of the cycle with my eyes open. Each new loop helping me to discover and reassess what I am experiencing and understanding.

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to attend last Sunday's Skype discussion, so I have spent the week reading, with interest, all your posts and ideas about expectations. My research centres around the experience of 'play'. Through Heidegger and Gadamer I have come to understand that knowledge is gained through the play of our 'prejudgements' (expectations) and our new experiences (texts). 

As we encounter new ideas and experiences, we anticipate our future understanding of that experience. This anticipation is based on what we already know and understand, generated through the experiences we have already had. The new experience (text) will either substantiate or challenge our expected understanding. The former will help us to develop our original understanding and the latter will initiate a process of adaptation leading to new understanding and perspectives. Without our expectations or 'prejudices' we would be like a white-board wiped clean after each experience.

When we choose to engage with a text (experience) we bring our prejudgments/expectations/prejudices into 'play' with the new experience. We willingly decide to risk what we understand by opening it up and exposing it to 'otherness'. It is the play between the new and our anticipated understanding, that creates an in-between experience, which guides the process of understanding.

Each module asks us to engage with our 'prejudgements' and bring them into play with new ideas introduced to us on this MA - Ideas from philosophy, from our tutors, from our peers and from our lived experiences. By choosing to be here, we have put ourselves 'in the game.'

As with all play it is important to take the game seriously, in so doing, we can fully immerse ourselves in play - Gadamer states only through complete immersion in play can we create a state 'of being outside oneself' a state which creates 'the positive possibility of being wholly with someone else'. For me the key word in this quote is 'with' - play allows us to participate in a shared experience 'with' others. Understanding develops from new experience/text 'with' our original prejudgment/expectations. The knowledge is created between these two states, one does not limit or surpass the other.

My research inquiry has been built out of my expectations - I am now at the in-between stage, my job is to analyse the experience of my inquiry and the data collected 'with' my expectations. I must be open to the play between all the ideas emerging. Some will substantiate the concepts that led me to be interested in my line of inquiry, and others will challenge what I anticipated to understand. Being open to both is the most important rule to 'the game'

Gadamer H G: Truth and Method. Translated by Weinsheimer & Marshall. 2nd revised edition. New York: Continuum 2000

Heidegger M Being an Time. Translated by Macquarrie & Robinson. New York, Harper & Row Publishers, 1962

4 weeks is such a short/long time.

 

We are a third into our last module - that seems totally amazing to me! 

The journey has been incredibly deep and yet really short at the same time. While zooming with some of my peers in Module 3 last week, we all agreed we have arrived in a totally different space, both mentally and emotionally, from where we were this time  last year, when we began Module 1.The world has changed around us, but somehow it seems as if this course has prepared us to step-up to the new challenges the world now forces upon us.

But where am I within Module 3, within my research?

I have just finished the data collection section - I am looking at how dance improvisation as play affects us through empathy, kindness and care. Over the last few weeks, we have danced on the beach, in the woods, in the park and in our homes connected through zoom. The experience has been glorious, the data collected, huge!

I have spent today taking stock sorting and organising data so I can begin the process of triangulation. Going back to the books and handbook to make sure I understand the task ahead. Now I have an indulgent few weeks planned reliving our 'days-out' - looking at it from every angle, rethinking what I saw — rehearing the words spoken — and re-experiencing and experiencing anew as I discover more questions and I am challenged by new ideas. I will be trying to see, feel and hear the experience of others. In short I hope to connect and research through embodied empathy.

Recently I read these words:

'That is being embodied implies being embedded as well - being embedded in a society, a culture, a language... We are not merely embodied as individuals. Our culture, our language and our art tell us that our way-of-being-in-the-world means being with others'. (Betty Ann Block, 2001)

Of course (I thought) dance's power is its embodied power, subsequently its embedded power. Maybe it's the world outside, but each literary path I take, leads me to the power of the politics of dance. Something I hadn't considered until now — Until right now dance, for me, was a very personal journey — how could I have forgotten 'The Personal is the Political!' Suddenly I have a new way of seeing, how this will affect my research I am not sure, but I am sure it should.

https://www.rigabiennial.com/en/riboca-2/programme/event-dance

This is a link to Andre Lepecki's talk: Movement in the Confinement (or: Choreopandemia) - it shifted my view on the politics of dance, a small shift in perspective and all the ideas across my life have begun to line up. 

I absolutely love the surprises discovered when researching and the effects they have on me.

I'm sorry this is a little meandering but it's the week I have been having, I'm also sorry for the weird paragraphing but I can't seem to fix the blogger glitch!

Block B, 2001 - The Dance: Essence of Embodiment - Article in Theoretical Medicine and Bioethics · February 2001

I've just seen this and wanted to share it with you...

 A very short blog but I just wanted to share this - Fabulous!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TQlDgR-78s

It seemed to refer to our conversation about shared empathy with the audience and witnessing. Let me know what you think.

The 'Of Course' of Embodied Knowledge

It was a really interesting discussion last night and as Adesola said at the end, probably the most fluid conversation we have had. If nothing else the pandemic has given us a lot of practice at communicating through Skype and Zoom, which seemed to help us navigate the conversation. 

My area of research at the moment is embodied knowledge, not just how this applies to the dancer but to our whole life. Husserl tells us that:
'Every perceiving consciousness has this peculiarity, that it is the consciousness of the embodied self-presence of an individual object'. (Husserl 1931)
By this I understand him to mean that none of us are free-floating consciousnesses wafting through life, we are embodied in our living-selves. Everything we do and everything we learn is through our bodily experience, nothing comes to us just as thought, we understand things through the experiences we have.

These experiences lead to an embodied knowledge, for me this means, that what our body understands is equal or greater than the sum of the thoughts we have about this.

For example, take snooker players; with each shot they must embody the principles of mathematics, wikihow neatly demonstrates the many mathematical principles at work when taking a shot.

https://www.wikihow.com/Play-Pool-Like-a-Mathematician#Calculating-the-Angle-to-Strike-an-Object-Ball

However, most snooker players are not working out formulas before each shot, they take it based on their embodied knowledge of how to take that shot. If the snooker player decided to investigate the mathematical principles at play, they would think 'of course I understand that' because it would make sense to their embodied understanding of the game. Importantly the mathematical principles were developed out of human experience, the experience came first and the theory to articulate and understand it came second

It is exactly the same for philosophy. The theories we are grappling with now came out of lived experiences and the desire to explain the 'why, what and how' of that experience. What I find really fascinating about this MA learning journey is the 'Of Course' moments. These moments occur when I read something that articulates ideas I already understand through my lived experience, but possibly couldn't articulate them as well as Dewey, Husserl, Heidegger...
When I am tackling a text, which I think is new learning, sometimes instead of thinking 'oh yes now I understand' I think 'of course' because I intrinsically recognise my experience in the new learning. These texts and theories resonate with me and form the framework that underpin the ideas I am now researching.

Everyone's MA journey will be different and personal, I am endlessly fascinated to hear all of your ideas and experiences - Thank you

What a week!

This week I began the data collection for my research inquiry project with three workshops exploring improvisation and how it relates to play, empathy and kindness.

 
Over the last two years I have been privileged to work with a group of mature dancers. Like most people we have worked hard to find ways to connect physically and emotionally through lockdown, embracing both the restrictions and freedoms granted by working across the internet.

However, very excitingly my research workshops were all site-specific. We danced in the park, the woods and on a huge sunny beach! The combination of freedom of space, freedom of movement and mental freedom transformed the experience into something quite unique and frankly glorious.

I am writing this looking out of my window with the wind battering the trees and the grey clouds deepening in colour as they threaten more rain. It seems crazy that earlier this week we danced in the sun-shine, our movements flowing in and out of the sea and entwining with the trees - Wow, how we played!

Although I know I am collecting data for my research project, I am aware it is really important to be completely present in the moment, sharing the experience with my peers. Not just for the honesty required to investigate my inquiry question, but because of the world we are in, here and now. Who knows where we are heading and what future restrictions are coming our way. When life is challenging it is always important to seize every moment of joy!

Thank you Iris for calling us to arms in your blog 'A REVOLUTIONARY SUMMER PART I - JOY. I wanted to share my experience of joy, made possible through the learning processes of this extraordinary degree. I am continually surprised by the unexpected pleasures it brings me.

Iris' Blog: https://irisdebritouk.blogspot.com/2020/09/revolutionary-summer-part-i-joy-wow.html

Where to Begin?

It's always great to have the welcome-back Skype, it feels like I can give myself permission to really begin. Amazingly I am commencing Module Three it feels exciting to finally get my research project going.

In the Skype on Friday a Module One students asked; what starts on Monday 14th? I remember feeling exactly the same way:

Where is the beginning? How will I know what to do? When does the learning begin?

And now (feeling like a veteran) I can say with confidence - The learning never stops!

This beginning is just the tilting of your view-point, turning to look reflectively at who and what you are, both professionally and personally. Allowing time to engage with new ideas as well as reengaging with old embedded knowledge.

 

I have read a few of the new blogs since Friday and yes, lets all blog more, engage more and use the time and space (we have gifted ourselves) to get the most out of this wonderful experience.

It feels good to be back!

P.S - I'm sorry but I missed the name of the Module One student, I'm sure we'll get to know each other soon.

Hello from your student voice leader

I just wanted to say 'Hello' as your new student voice leader. My contact details can be found in the 'Programme Voice Folder' which is near the bottom of your module study page. Please email me any thoughts both good and bad about your experience so far.

The purpose of the role, is for me to feed-back anything positive and non-positive, you may be experiencing, so the information can be used to make any improvements necessary.

We have a PVG meeting next Tuesday, I'm really sorry, but I won't be in the group chat on Sunday morning as I am flying at that time, it would have been an opportunity for you to share your thoughts with me, so please do email me (before Tuesday) with anything you think needs to be discussed

We had a pre-meeting chat with Adesola which raised some interesting points;

Firstly there is a folder in the 'Programme Voice Folder' called 'Student Sharing Space', this was created after the last PVG meeting. The idea of the folder is that we as students can put in 'hints and tips' for other students, to share what has worked well for us. As you will note it is empty, mainly due to the fact we didn't know it was there! It would be great if we could all add something that would help make the journey smoother for everyone else on the course. If you have any tips, please email them to me and I will get them added to the folder.

Secondly, Adesola and Helen would really like to help us create ways to function better as a community. As a learning environment, we can all sometimes feel very isolated. Any ideas that you think would help facilitate us feeling more connected would be very welcome. With this in mind, I wonder whether a whatsApp group would help the blogging process, we could whatsApp when we have posted or responded to a blog, allowing us to engage in a more immediate way than is occurring at the moment - I would be happy to set this up, email me if you think this is a good idea and would like to join, or if you have a better suggestion. (email details in the PVG folder)

Thirdly, I anticipate there will be issues you want to share, but please also let me know the positives, all courses need to justify there existence in the current financial climate and I believe this course offers a really unique learning experience and we should celebrate that too.

Hope to hear from you soon
xx

My MAPP map and MORE

Having worked my way through the handbook again, I am beginning to see it as a map (a MAPP map) and like all maps the more you get to know the terrain the easy it is to spot your route through it.
On my first journey through, all the roads seemed equally interesting and I spent a lot of time meandering off the beaten track.
Second time; I was more aware of where the routes would lead but still got diverted by points that interested me on the way.
Third time and I'm able to keep to a focused journey, there are still byways I want to explore, to see if they lead somewhere surprising, but I'm now secure that the map (handbook) will steer me back to where I feel I need to be - Hooray a little progress.

I also took a look at the MORE form - I'm quite adept at grant forms, my process is to look at the actual form as early as possible. I fill in all the sections I can immediately (name, address etc), note down all the questions I know how to fill in, but need more time to do them justice. Then I note all the sections that don't mean anything to me and need more research. All I can say is even for someone used to forms, it's large! My advise would be to familiarise yourselves with it as soon as possible.

The Power of Pina

I understanding from the handbook that the bases of a good, strong research project is grounding myself in a 'theoretical framework' a structure to build my research questions and methods on.

Recently I have come to understand (through feedback from my supervisor), that my actual understanding of who I am is in flux; my philosophical framework, my practice, my ethics, my lived experience - has all shifted and I have been trying to base my understanding on things 'I used to be sure of'

So before I moved on with module two - placing myself in a theoretical framework for my research, I thought I better go back, right to the beginning, and rediscover what is and what isn't important/relevant/interesting/necessary to both my practice and who I am.

I have spent the last few weeks revisiting writers, artists dancers, films and friends, who have had an influence on me - Frankly it has been a joy!

My journey culminated last Friday night at Sadler's Wells with a performance of Pina Bauch's 'Bluebeard'.

I have always loved Bauch's work and wondered whether time and my recent reflections would change my experience of it.
When I dance I understand through my embodied experience the power and necessity of the connections we make. Through dance I feel what is to be understood.
When watching dance, I have often wondered at the disconnect between dancer and audience, there is a pleasure in the experience but it is less visceral, diminished somehow.
Pina's work always enters my understanding through my emotional experience of it, I feel no need to analyse it, dissecting it for meaning, the meaning is the experience, undiminished. 

It was a great way to draw to a close my exploration of 'me' and begin my exploration of my research; it's methods and frameworks.
I have a little catching-up to do, but all research is good research and will lead me somewhere I'm sure.

Don't re-invent the wheel!

I had been going round and round my bubble-circles of ideas for my research inquiry, with each circle another realisation, another question I need to ask before that question, before this question, before I reach the question that is relevant to my 'nagging thought of inquiry'. When I remembered reading in the handbook 'Don't reinvent the wheel!'

So I thought about my research questions - especially the ones that I feel I need to understand before I can carry out my research, but I don't want to make my whole research about them. I typed them into Ecosia (a new search engine that plants a tree for every search you do) - And WOW, there was a whole world of articles, books, Ted talks, choreography's to help me fill in the gaps and begin to hone what it is I am really curious about. It's like leap-frogging forward instead of wallowing around stuck and overwhelmed.

I haven't read, watched, listened to them all yet, I am in my foraging stage - but it's great to know they are there, I feel like I have a team of great dance artist and researchers in my corner, who's interests overlap with mine and who's hard work is something I can use to help me turn my 'nagging thoughts' into a fully fledged inquiry question.

Looking Back - Moving Forward

I am excited to be starting module two and getting stuck into the process of pinning down my research inquiry, but it seemed appropriate (on this course) to begin module two, by looking back and reflecting on our learning from module one.

I learnt a lot from the process of the AOLs and the final essay and with the help of Adesola's feedback, I came to understand that it is something about ending and beginning again (the part in the middle) that enabled me to clarify my thinking to begin to move forward. I think I explained this a little better in my response to Adesola:

"it was interesting to me that the moment the essays were submitted my mind starting understanding the theories that threaded through Module one in a more complete way, as if in the act of ending everything became clearer. It is possible, with more time, I would have reached the same understanding and articulated this more clearly in the essay, however, I feel it has something to do with the process of finishing and beginning again, as you and Helen have said ‘the place in the middle’ that helps connect the learning."

Connection is so important for the learning process on this course and I am determined (like others have said) to make full use of all the exciting connections made possible by the blogs and Skype. For those who are starting module one I wanted to post a little thought I had in my 'review of learning' essay about the learning journey this MA affords us and the connections we make;

"I understand each student on this course comes from a different set of experiences, the connection we have is this MA and dance. The combination of learning from this MA and our prior experience, is unique for each of us, the connections we make allows knowledge to develop in a connectivist way.  By blogging about our reflections and ideas, we are each adding to the learning journey of the whole group, by framing these journeys in this MA, enables us to move forward individually but connected. Through Skype and blogging, I encounter theories and knowledge I didn’t know I was looking for, sometimes this causes immediate development of learning, affecting my research and sometimes it adds to my ‘slow-cooker’ of ideas, to dip into when ready."

So, welcome to all those beginning the journey, I am looking forward to hearing your unique perspective, and for all us 'veterans' thank you for all the inspiration so far, I'm going to do my best to share my journey, research, theories and ideas as often as possible. 

Reflecting on reflecting on my learning

I am just coming up for air from my journey through the AOL's - It is interesting unpicking the process for my Personal Reflections essay

I found the road through the AOL's at times like quicksand sucking me under drowning in self-doubt, then through the doubt, a realisation, a means to articulate something I knew I understood but couldn't quite conceptualise. Through the process of articulation, I came to understand both  what I already knew and the next step on the path ahead, the next step of research. Which inevitable led to more doubt, more quicksand, more moments of articulation and more paths of research.

Reflecting on this process my mind wandered back to a blog Adesola posted 'Ways of Doing Art...' 04/11/19. At the time of first watching Tim Ingold's lecture I was deep in the world of AOL's but I knew I wanted to re-engage with it today with a slightly clearer mind. 

So much of what is said chimes with the new paths I am finding to explore, below are three 'precious' gems which I wanted to share and explore later;

RESEARCH 

RE    SEARCH

literally means

SEARCH  AGAIN

'Research is the pursuit of truth through the practice of curiosity and care'

Curiosity - Care - Curate

 come from the Latin Curare meaning to look after

It is this link between research and it's ethical implications that is swirling around inside me waiting for me to find the articulation to make what I know known.

My thoughts/questions

When research is embodied it has to be done with care, there is simple no other way!

So, what does that mean for non-embodied research?

What are the practicalities of marrying the two in this MA?

I'm off now for more Research to search again what I know and what I don't know...

Researching my old learning while experiencing new learning

As well as writing my AOL's, I've been having a little whirlwind of activity over the past few weeks - On starting this MA I decided to also engage in as many new dance opportunity as I could, it has been interesting to have experiences with my mental eye viewing them through my AOL's.
Last weekend I went to the Ageless Festival at Yorkshire Dance, Leeds, as the name suggests the weekend was an exploration of what it means to dance at any age. 
An amazing weekend of workshops and talks; the highlights include Liz Aggiss' performance, chatting with Nanrom about his re-engagement with performance and working with Galit Liss and experiencing her Gila Movement.
The name Gila, which in Hebrew means age, joy, and discovery, reflects the spirit of women who choose to dance at any age. (Ageless Brochure). 
Galit is a performance artist who chooses her medium to be the mature female dancer, she says she fell in love with the integrity of the stories that the mature body produces. Instead of being a choreographer who makes work for the older dancer, she uses the older female dancer as a tool to represent, disrupt and challenge the narratives she is presenting. (Galit 2019).
Her process led her to develop a movement style that helps women create integrity in their dance movement. She uses - Visualise - Feel - Imagine. Each movement she encourages us to, see; what we are doing, feel; sense what is actually there and imagine; both as a tool for the quality of the movement (i.e walking through sand) and as an eye from outside.

Her use of the mature dancer as a tool for her art, transcends cultural stereotypes about 'old dancers' - Her work Go, combines the mature dancers with images of combat and military customs, she says;

In the work she uses the older body to subvert our expectations, allowing her to interrogate themes far removed from 'the older dancer' - the juxtaposition challenging us to reconsider our prejudices.

Galit says;

"I found that the movement of an older body has a "physiological aesthetic" that in the context of the stage has implications with the personal, social, and political representation that I am interested in touching upon. I felt that working with the older body sends us to a delicate place where we constantly wonder: Is it possible? If not, then how can it be?" (Time Out 2018)

All this new thought stimulation keeps throwing-up moments of realisation about how I have come to know what know. These realisations mostly come through discussions about the new ideas, it is interesting that we sometimes only know what we understand when we need to articulate it - Which I guess is the point to the AOL's